5 Ways To Make Him Value You And Want To Commit (Advice From A Guy)

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Today we’re going to talk about how to get a guy to value you more so he wants to commit.

If you feel like you’re being taken for granted and you want a guy to feel like you’re an incredibly valuable woman to him, I’m going to give you five different ways to make sure that he feels like you’re that amazing valuable special woman in his life.

When you make him value you, he starts to feel like you’re unique and special.

The higher that your value raises in his eyes, the more that he’ll feel like you’re a woman that he wants to commit to, give everything to and take off the market.

You’re a woman that he doesn’t want to lose, right?

So you want to raise your value as high as you can in his eyes without making him feel like you’re unattainable.

Here are the different ways that you’re going to do it.

1. Make him work for your attention and satisfaction.

The more that a guy invests in you and works for you, the more that he’ll value you.

If he invests time, energy, emotion, physical investment, affection, financial investment— the more ways that he invests in you— the more you’ll feel like he doesn’t want to let you go.

When a lot of woman find a guy they really like, they do all of the things he should be doing.

They’re investing in him.

They’re spending money on him.

They’re doing all these things for him.

They become the social planner of his life.

They do all these things where they’re investing in this guy.

They feel like this guy’s really great.

Then, the guy is like “you know, I don’t have any investment in this at all, I don’t think it’s a big deal if I leave.”

Whereas if he’s the one that does all the investment, he’s going to feel more like, “Oh, she’s an awesome woman, I don’t want her to go.”

The way that you do that is by leaning back.

You have got to lean back.

A lot of women freak out because they think if they start leaning back, the guy is going to disappear.

In reality, a guy is more likely to disappear if you don’t lean back, right?

He’s going to start feeling smothered, he’s going to start feeling like he needs to pull away and he needs some time to himself.

Instead, you want him to be coming to you.

You want him to be investing in you.

You want him to be planning things.

You want him to be putting the effort in.

The only way that you can do that is by creating a space and then inviting him to do those things for you instead of being all on top of him and doing those things for him.

2. Make him aware that you’re choosing him but you’re not completely tied down yet.

We actually got a question on our channel not too long ago from a woman who said that she wanted to let a guy know that she was going to date other people because she felt like he wasn’t going anywhere.

He was angry about it and she didn’t know what to do.

My response was you should tell him you really like him, think he’s an amazing guy but you don’t want to get serious with anybody who’s not serious with you.

If you get serious with him and he’s not serious about you, there’s an analogy that I use where it’s like you tell him that there’s this awesome pool that you’re jumping into.

You jump into the pool.

You’re there swimming by yourself and he’s up like, “Well, I wasn’t even really sure that I wanted to get into the pool yet.”

If you jump in the pool before he does, then you might be swimming by yourself.

That’s why you need to know that he’s going to be serious about you before you get serious with him.

My suggestion is that you let him know that you like him AND you date other people.

Let him know that you think he’s awesome but you’re looking for something serious and if he’s not willing to get serious with you, then you’re going to start seeing other people.

3. Don’t allow bad behavior.

Don’t allow insulting behavior. A lot of times, what guys will do is they’ll test your boundaries, right?

They’ll see how far you’re willing to let them go.

A lot of times, women let a guy walk all over them because they’re afraid that they’re going to lose the guy.

That shows a guy that you don’t think very highly of yourself.

If you don’t respect yourself, then he’s not going to respect you.

Instead, what you want to do is you want to have boundaries and set those boundaries.

If he tries to push past those boundaries, you want to either back away or tell him that you’re not OK with whatever behavior that he’s doing.

The more that you push back against him, testing your boundaries, the more you’ll feel like you’re valuable.

Not allowing bad behavior is a really easy and simple way to  show a man that you have values by creating and maintaining your boundaries.

4. Make him work harder when returns after pulling away.

When a guy pulls away from you a bit, what you want to do is to make him work harder when he comes back to you to win you over.

A lot of times what ends up happening in relationships is people need time, right? They need time away, they need to pull back, they might have an emergency that’s going on.

Maybe he feels smothered and so he needs some time to himself, whatever it is.

A lot of times, guys will pull away.

When he comes back, you want to lean back, give him space and allow him to work harder to win you over.

Then get back to the same space that you were in the relationship before so that he creates that investment in you and feels like you’re an amazing woman that he doesn’t want to let go of.

5. Have an amazing life of your own.

This is one of the most important things that a lot of women kind of skip over. Sometimes women don’t have the life balance for it, right?

It’s having things going on in your own life like achieving something great for yourself, having something amazing going on so your life is not just you and him, right?

A lot of times, women will get into a relationship with a guy and then she tries to fill up every moment of his free time with stuff to do with her.

She’s says to him:

“Oh, it’s Saturday, we’re waking up and going for brunch.”

“We’re going to go for a hike.”

“We’re going to go to this concert.”

“We’re going to do all these things I have planned for us.”

Then the guy thinks:

“I need some time to chill out and have to myself.”

If you create that alone time for him before he asks you for space because you’ve already got things going on that are interesting in your own life, he’ll value you a lot more.

He’ll feel like you’re an amazing woman because you’ll stand out from all the other women that he’s met.

Instead of smothering him, pushing him away and making him feel like he needs more alone time, he’ll feel like he wants to be closer to you and wants to be with you more.

On the other extreme, a lot of women make the mistake of pulling back so far or having so much going on in their lives that they don’t have any room for a guy to be there. That’s not what I’m talking about here.

I’m talking about creating a balance in the middle.

Not smothering him and being all over him and not having so many things going on that you don’t have time for him at all.

There’s a middle ground where you have things that you do alone and it’s fun and awesome but you also have time to hang out with him, spend time with him and build a deeper relationship with him.

If you’re ready to know exactly what to say and do to attract the man and the relationship you’ve always wanted, I want to share some words you can tell your man that will make him want to give you the relationship you’ve always dreamed of…

These words form something I call a “Love Frame” that makes a man feel like it’s his mission in life to treat you like a queen.

If you’re struggling to get your man to “step up” and give you the romance you’ve always wanted, you need to watch this video right now…

Matthew Coast

About Matthew Coast

Matthew Coast is an award winning dating and relationship coach, author and entrepreneur. Matthew has been featured on CNN, ABC, The Phoenix Business Journal, Success Magazine and many more.

Through his bestselling programs, The Love Frames, Make Him Want You, How To Talk To a Guy and Commitment Connection community, Matt teaches women how to have committed, lasting relationships with quality men.

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