Today we are going to be talking about five signs that a guy is an alpha male.
Alpha males are a really interesting concept. Both women and men seem to think about alpha male characteristics in some capacity or another.
I guess the theory goes that humans are identical to wolves and that wolves have alpha males in their packs and that humans have packs that have an alpha male in them or something like that. I don’t really get it. But, let’s just kind of entertain the idea that this whole alpha male thing might be something that’s happening in your own mind.
Regardless, how do you know if a guy is an alpha male?
I’m just going to go with that language for the sake of talking to you because you clicked on an article called how to tell if he is an alpha male. So part of you wants to know.
To define an alpha male, what I’m really talking about is a guy who is not leading the pack necessarily but a guy who knows what his life is about and he’s going after it.
We’re going to talk about five signs that you have found one of these guys because I can understand how women want to be with a guy who knows what his life is about. An alpha male is not around to bullshit himself or anyone else and spend his life dicking around with video games and sports.
Let’s go ahead and get into the five signs that a guy is an alpha male.
1. An alpha male doesn’t care about other people’s approval.
The first alpha male characteristic is that he isn’t trying really hard to impress other people or dominate them.
Oftentimes, people think that an alpha male is a domineering sort of kind of guy, right?
He’s ultra high testosterone— has a caveman club on his shoulder and is going to start swinging it around until everyone bows to his every whim.
But that’s not really what an alpha male actually is.
That’s somebody who is posturing, somebody who is actually really terrified of you not agreeing with them. Weak people posture.
They try to make themselves stronger than they really are because they’re so concerned about your perception of them and whether you see them as a strong person and think they’re good enough. They worry about whether they’re looking good and how they’re coming off.
It’s just like the insecure, meek, nice guy but the opposite way that insecurity shows up.
That is not really a true alpha male. That’s just a try-hard kind of guy.
So, if a guy who spends a lot of time trying to impress you, win your approval, or even in subtle ways make himself seem strong or right or like a know-it-all then that guy is probably not an alpha male.
The truth is that real alpha males who know what their life is about, are on their own path and going after what’s important to them don’t give a shit about what you think about them.
They really don’t give a shit. Why? Because they are going after what they want, and that is the most important thing in their life. Your opinion of them is not the most important thing in their life. And if you don’t like them then, sorry. But if you like them, that’s cool. You can come along for the ride.
But they’re not trying to micromanage your perception of them because they know what their life is about, what’s important to them, and they’re going after it.
An alpha male’s mission is the most important thing to them, not whether or not they appear cool, look good or whether you swoon when they walk by. Maybe that’s icing on the cake but that’s not what they are living for.
2. He knows what’s really important to him.
The second alpha male characteristic is that he really knows what his life is about and what’s important to him.
Maybe you’ve interacted with him, maybe you’ve talked with him. Does it seem like he has a burning passion in his life, something that he is like working towards?
A lot of people have something that they want to do in their life but maybe they aren’t taking action for any number of reasons.
I’m not talking about like the dreamers who say, “Yeah, wouldn’t it be nice if like maybe someday I kind of start a company and maybe we could do this thing and blah, blah, blah, whatever.” I’m not talking about those guys.
I’m talking about the guys that want it so bad that they are making their mission happen right now.
Maybe it’s not all together yet but they are taking action. They are not just sitting on the couch, commenting about how maybe someday this will happen or saying, “wouldn’t it be nice if?”.
They are actually out there taking action, making the moves to put these things together. Sure, they might make mistakes. They may not always be there. They might have setbacks from time to time.
They’re actually out there trying to make it happen.
Making it happen is definitely a sign of an alpha male, not a dreamer and not somebody who is just checked out, zoned out, going to work and watching TV.
An alpha male is somebody who is actually on his mission.
There’s nothing wrong with watching TV. There’s nothing with just having a job or hobbies. But, if you’re just kind of going through life dead and not alive then that’s probably not a sign that you’re an alpha male.
3. An alpha has high standards.
But the third sign that a guy might be an alpha male is that he has very high standards for himself and for others.
An alpha male really knows what he wants. So he’s not going to surround himself with a bunch of people that are going to bullshit him, tell him what he wants to hear and be like, “Oh yeah, isn’t that cool?”
He wants to surround himself with people who are also committed to excellence, who are also committed to pursuing what they want out of life and going after it full throttle.
And… he is probably going to want high standards out of you as well.
Now, just because an alpha demands high standards of himself and of others doesn’t mean that he is going to be a perfectionist. There’s a difference between being a perfectionist and having high standards.
Being a perfectionist is often a symptom of emotionally unavailable men or women because it gives them the out for not having to commit to you like, “Oh, well, you weren’t perfect so I can’t commit to you.” That’s not what I’m talking about.
I’m talking about the kind of man who cares so much about the people in his life that he wants to help them rise to the occasion. He wants to create the best of what he can in his life and have a symbiotic partnership where you both lift each other up.
4. He is a man of his word.
The fourth sign he’s an alpha male is that he has follow-through. He takes his words very seriously. He’s not just going to talk about something and then flake out at the last minute or do a bunch of talk about something and never follow through.
An alpha male takes his commitments seriously and he follows through on them seriously. If you’ve ever watched a movie or TV show where there’s just like one of those guys that people root for and want to be around all the time, it’s probably because that guy is somebody that they can trust.
The key foundation of trust is that you follow through on what you say you’re going to do.
If you say you’re going to do something, you do it. If you say you’re going to be somewhere, you go there. If you say you’re going to go out with somebody, you go out with that person.
And, circumstances in life might pop up or something like that but you’re going to make the best effort that you possibly can to follow through on your word because that is definitely something that alpha males tend to have in common.
5. An alpha is not afraid to take the lead.
The fifth sign that a guy is an alpha male is that he is not afraid to take the lead.
He might often be the one to lead of a group of people. When it comes to a dating situation he might take the lead. When it comes to going on a date, he might take charge of the direction things go.
But it’s not necessarily that an alpha is always in the lead because that goes back to trying to look good, trying to make sure that everybody sees him as “The Man.”
An alpha male doesn’t care about being “The Man” because an alpha male knows what his life is about. So he doesn’t have a problem taking the lead in situations, organizations or on dates or in social groups.
…But he doesn’t need to take the lead.
He also is totally OK with kicking back and letting other people make decisions if it comes to that. But, if people can’t decide or if they need somebody to take the lead, he has no problem stepping up and saying, “Hey guys, why don’t we go to this place over here?”
So, those are the five signs of an alpha male.
If you’re an alpha male reading this, what do you think? Did I get them? Did I miss something? Am I totally off base?
If you’re a woman and you’ve dated an alpha male, if you’re a connoisseur of alpha males, what do you think? Did I miss something? Did I catch it? Or what’s going on?
Go ahead and leave some comments down below and let me know what you think.
This has been Clay with Relationship Inner Game.
To learn more about how to meet, date, and attract the kind of person that you want to be with, head on over to my website now.