Go back to part 4 of this video here.
“If you have insecurities with the one that you are with, how do you work on yourself? How do you get these pesky thoughts out of your head knowing it most likely is it true?”
Just as an example, if you have trust issues.
My big ex that I was with for seven years, I did not trust her. When things got hard between us, she would flirt with other guys, date other guys while we were still together, all of that.
I don’t think she ever actually like physically cheated on me. Maybe she did. I don’t know. But she definitely emotionally cheated. So I did not trust her to be around other guys.
When I started dating again, I carried a lot baggage with me into the dating world.
I was really insecure, anxious and untrusting of other women. Even with Mika (my wife) when I first met her.
It was through constantly reminding myself this is a different situation.
For example:
“That’s what my ex did in the past. That’s obviously not all women. It’s just one woman out of you know half of seven billion people, three and a half billion people, three and a half billion women.
Obviously, not every woman is going to cheat on me. Obviously, not every woman is going to start flirting with somebody as soon as I’m not in the room.
Do I have any evidence for this? No, I don’t. OK. Let’s keep going forward.“
As you do this over and over and over again and the landmine doesn’t blow up when you take another step forward, you’re going to start to get more and more trust.
You’ll get more and more trust in the relationship, the process and the other person. Eventually, those anxieties will start to ease themselves.
First, you have to recognize that your thoughts are not necessarily true.
Next, stop and examine them and look for evidence one way or the other.
Again, I’m not saying this other person isn’t cheating on you or this other person isn’t going to turn around and flirt with somebody as soon as you walk out the door.
But you have got to give the benefit of the doubt essentially until they actually do something to show they’re just like your ex.
As you do this and continue to challenge these thoughts in your mind and keep these insecurities and fears in check, you’ll start to decrease your insecurity, fear, and anxiety and you’ll start to feel more and more comfortable with your current partner.
Want another chance with someone you love?
If you miss someone and want a rare chance at saving your relationship, join me inside The New Beginnings Course.
Thousands of people have used this secret weapon to get back together and make their relationships even better than before the breakup.
Inside you’ll find out exactly how to create a real, deep connection with your ex and bring them back to you.
Click here now to get started.
