If you’re wondering how to make a man respect you, it’s probably because you’ve been disrespected and not cherished by men enough to make you want to get answers.
You want someone to love you and respect you and sometimes that sounds like a challenge. Or a chore.
So.. what makes a man respect a woman?
The truth is, there is no fast and easy way to make a man respect you.
In fact, you can’t make anyone feel anything.
You can’t make a man respect you anymore than he can make you respect him.
The real secret to how to make a man respect you is to consistently show up as a woman he feels is worthy of his respect.
With that in mind, here’s how to go from doormat to dream woman.
1. Challenge him.
A man loves a woman who he can have a friendly debate with.
Express your opinions even if they are different than his, in fact– share your opinions especially if they are different than his.
Disagreeing with someone without putting them down is a fine art. Learn that art and use it in your conversations with men.
He will highly respect your ability to hold your own without getting upset or attacking him.
2. Be willing to laugh at yourself.
A woman who can trip down a set of stairs on a first date and then make a joke about it is probably going to have more of a shot at gaining a man’s respect than one who freaks out.
A sense of humor sends the message that you are easy to be with and don’t expect everybody to be perfect.
However, there is a fine line between laughing at yourself and putting yourself down.
Be careful not to be too hard on yourself or consistently put yourself down.
In the long run, you’ll come off insecure instead of confident– which will not make a man respect you.
3. Respect yourself.
If you don’t respect yourself, he will know it, no matter what you say to try and hide it.
And if you don’t respect yourself, you have no business expecting respect from him either.
That might sound harsh, but people respond to your being and who you show up as in relationship.
That’s why respecting yourself is a base condition to gain respect from a man.
So what exactly does it mean to respect yourself?
Show yourself the same love and care that you want from others and demonstrate it both verbally and non-verbally.
Stop putting yourself down, quit trying to be “humble” by hiding your accomplishments and do whatever you can to honor who you truly are. This helps create genuine love for yourself.
Respecting yourself doesn’t mean that you have to act any specific way, it means that you stand by how you’re acting. Self respect is created in house. You get to make the rules about it.
It’s when you act in ways that are unaligned with who you truly are that you will have a much harder time earning respect.
Say “No” when something doesn’t feel good to you and be completely up front about it. Honor your own wishes, desires and goals.
Your nonverbal communication and body language play a big role in demonstrating your self respect and self confidence to others.
Nonverbal cues show off your inner confidence— such as making lots of eye contact, smiling, sitting up straight, and laughing out loud.
These body language behaviors show people that you are pleased with yourself, feel confident and happy and don’t mind showing it.
4. Respect him.
You will get as good as you give in love, so if you don’t show a man that you respect him, he is not going to respect you (or love you) in return.
Respect a man’s desire for space, his privacy, his time, his honesty, and even thank him for it.
Make sure you say, “thanks for calling/texting me back”, “thanks for the invitation,” you get the picture.
Needy, disrespectful people don’t take the time to graciously thank others for the little things they do– they simply feel entitled and want more.
A simple thank you and show of gratitude goes a very long way in earning a man’s respect because it shows him that you appreciate all of his efforts in your direction.
And… one secret about men is that a woman’s happiness and respect is often all men really want from women they fall in love with.
5. Be honest.
This is a day and age where true honesty is difficult to come by.
Always be kind and honest with him, even when he won’t like exactly what you have to say.
Powerful and respected women share their feelings with the man in their lives.
Often.
Especially the painful ones.
When a man knows you are honest with him, he will not only give that back, but you will earn his respect as a quality person who sticks by their word.
6. Share your ambitions.
Make sure it’s clear that you have life goals of your own that you aren’t willing to compromise.
Don’t hide your desires in life from him just because you aren’t sure what he’ll think or whether he’ll approve.
Hiding who you really are is not a behavior that garners respect from men (or anyone, really).
Men respect goals and ambition, as they are very familiar with these traits themselves.
Just make sure that whatever your goals, they are indeed yours.
Don’t borrow his goals and share them back to him as yours also. If you try to mimic him like this, you’ll lose, rather than gain his respect.
7. Teach him how to treat you.
A woman who knows her worth and doesn’t put up with anything less than that is a woman that not only earns respect from a man, but the respect of all of those around her.
If a man says something that is a little hurtful or feels disrespectful to you, don’t allow it.
If he shows up late or doesn’t keep his promises, leave and explain why.
When a man knows that you won’t put up with certain things, you make it clear that if he really wants you, he will correct his behavior.
Note: this is another area with a fine line.
Calmly mentioning that you’re not pleased about him showing up an hour late is much different than tearing him a new one over a genuine delay that was out of his control.
Practice the art of teaching him how to treat you without showing extreme anger or emasculating him.
When it comes to making a man respect you, your actions work MUCH better than words.
If he’s over 20 minutes late to meet you with no explanation or call, leave.
When he asks why you weren’t there, simply say “I waited 20 minutes and didn’t see or hear from you so I left.”
Then leave it at that.
Let reality teach him about your personal brand of self respect and standards, instead of using a long talk to get your point across.
He will get the message that if he wants to see you, he has to follow through with his word or give you more notice.
This way you avoid getting into a long, agonizing discussion about what he did wrong and being seen as controlling, nagging or harping on what he did wrong.
You must be ready to set and reinforce your boundaries to the point of leaving a man when he continually treats you disrespectfully or unkindly.
Sticking to your standards gives off the clear impression that you have boundaries and self-respect.
Both to him, and most importantly to yourself.
You are the one who has to wake up in the morning and look at yourself in the mirror. And you should be the one you are MOST trying to impress.
8. Take care of yourself.
One thing people neglect and gloss over when they get into relationships is who they actually are without the other person.
That’s why it’s important that you keep doing things that were important to you before you met him.
Make sure that you keep the long-standing appointments you have with yourself.
Do you have drinks with the girls every Friday night, and a spa day once a month?
Don’t automatically give these things up when he wants to spend time with you.
Having things going on that don’t involve him is important to gaining a man’s respect, keeping it long term and not losing yourself in a relationship.
I talk to women all the time in coaching who make the mistake of becoming a man’s chauffeur, cook, baker, maid and cleaner only to realize 15 years later that they have lost his respect and also driven him away.
Keeping a man’s respect over the long term is often about not losing his respect in the first place.
And you do this by refusing to give up what makes you happy outside the relationship.
A man who loves you won’t want you to give up who you are. Quite the opposite, actually.
You will never gain a man’s respect by giving up everything you love.
So, if reading this way to gain a man’s respect even gave you a twinge of worry, pick up that tennis racket or go for a swim or call a friend and get back to your LIFE. Whatever it is for you, get back at it.
9. Don’t hide your intelligence.
Some women think they have to dumb themselves down to attract a man (and I’m ashamed to admit I used to think so too).
This is simply not true.
People respect intelligence.
And if you’re smart, it’s not worth trying to hide it for a man or anyone else.
Also, if you hide your intelligence, wit and brilliance now, how long do you think you’ll have to keep up the fake persona if you actually manage to win him over?
A few months?
Your whole life?
Just say no to dumbing yourself down for anyone’s approval.
What men are repelled by is using your intelligence as a weapon by treating him with disrespect or intentionally one-upping him. You can be wicked smart but you can’t be a jerk about it.
10. Wait for sex.
Men and women view sex differently and treat it different biologically.
Women naturally bond and connect emotions to sex, while men often don’t.
If a man sleeps with you on the first date, it has nothing to do with an intense emotional connection for him, at least not as much as it could for you.
And… a big way to keep a man’s respect is to keep your intimate life completely on your terms.
If you don’t know someone well, don’t go to bed with them.
Save intimacy for when you’re truly feeling it and never let a man pressure you into going farther than you are comfortable with.
If you make him wait for sex until there is mutual respect on the table, it sends the message to him that you consider yourself a woman of worth and aren’t just giving yourself away to anybody.
Treating your body and intimacy as sacred is an important step in how to make a man respect you.
Any man who drops contact with you after you say no to having sex with him is NOT worth your energy at all.
Like all of these other ways to make a man respect you, your actions are what determine how well this works.
If you loudly announce that you aren’t having sex with him because he won’t respect you afterwards, that will send him running.
It smacks of tit-for-tat, negative game playing and makes it sound like you don’t respect his intentions toward you either.
He might really like you, and that will snap him right out of it.
Tell him what YOU want. “I want to get to know someone before we are intimate” is a different statement than including something about your fears around the way he will treat you afterward.
Also, simply stay out of situations where he’s going to expect to take your clothes off, like the invitation to go back to his house late and “watch a movie”.
And, save yourself a lot of pain and suffering by simply not answering late night phone calls or texts.
The late night booty-call is not a road that you want to go down if you’re trying to make him respect you and see you as a long-term partner.
The bottom line about how to make a man respect you.
Like every relationship in life, whether that is with your best friend, boyfriend or your Mom, you can’t make anyone respect you; it is up to you to earn respect.
By being a woman who is honest, keeps her promises, sticks to her standards, you become a woman of worth that he will want and need to be around.
We all love to be around quality, respectful people.
How to make a man respect you has a lot about who you are inside.
To feel real respect, it’s important to live in a respectable way even when you aren’t around him.
Want to manifest the love you want?
Then don’t miss out on my free masterclass, The 7 Blocks to Manifesting Love.
Inside you’ll discover the 7 sneaky blocks keeping you from gaining a man’s respect and having the love you want and deserve.
Click here now to get started.
