My name is Kate Spring. I’m a dating and relationship coach from the west coast of Canada.
Today we’re going to talk about how to flirt without being creepy.
1. The “You-Caught-Me” Glance.
The first point of contact to make with any woman with whom you’re trying to flirt is to make eye contact.
The best way to get her attention is to get caught checking her out or glancing at her.
Try to do this subtly– you’re glancing at her, NOT staring at her. So do a quick glance.
After she catches your first glance, give her a little nod.
After the second glance, smile like an, “oopsie, you caught me checking you out.”
You should establish eye contact first to ensure that she meets your eye contact.
Eye contact’s purpose is to establish mutual interest.
Just because a woman makes eye contact with you does not mean she wants to sleep with you.
She COULD be interested in you if you’ve made this connection. That’s why you could approach her and see what happens.
2. Mirror Her Posture to Build Rapport.
Remember that flirting is a response to attraction.
And attraction is evoking interest, pleasure or liking for someone.
So what else can you do to persuade a woman with whom you’ve never met that you’re the best candidate with whom to flirt and maybe even sleep with?
3. Compliment Her.
Our third tip about how to flirt without being creepy out is to look at the topic of conversation.
Pick-up lines are a thing of the past, but compliments are the way of the future.
Flirting is all about making the other person feel good by giving them attention and asking them questions.
One way to give positive attention is to compliment her on something that she has chosen.
Compliment a woman on something she has chosen to wear, or the way that she has chosen to style her hair. Always compliment her on something that she has personally worked on (not something genetic like her appearance).
Compliments make people feel good about themselves when they’re around you.
As Maya Angelou once said,
“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
That is a statement that I personally live by.
4. Gentle Touches.
In psychologist Dr. Nicolas Guéguen’s research, “Courtship Compliance: The Effect of Touch On Women’s Behavior”, he suggests that there is evidence to prove that light tactile contact increases compliance to a wide variety of requests.
He conducted three experiments in three different locations. Each one had two different approaches.
First, a man approaching a woman and gently touching her.
The second was when a man approached a woman and made no physical contact.
Women were more attracted to men who engaged in gentle, momentary, tactile touching because it made them seem more dominant.
So use touch to your advantage. Playfully touch a woman to deepen your flirtatious connection.
Tickling is one of the oldest flirting methods in the book, you can touch a woman’s arm to get her attention, place your hand at the small of her back to guide her somewhere.
Find quick friendly ways to make physical contact with a woman to flirt without being creepy.
5. Have Fun.
And my last piece of flirting advice is to remember to have fun.
Take it slow so that you aren’t showing all of your cards at once.
Give a little and then see what you get in return flirt-wise from a girl.
Flirting is also a mindset, so please remember to have fun with it because if you aren’t having any fun, neither will the girl with whom you’re trying to flirt.
To get my best strategies for how to flirt, learn a “secret language” that will make her feel an uncontrollable lust for you by watching my free presentation here.
