Does He Really Love Me? 6 Signs It’s True Love


Does He Really Love MeHave you been involved in a relationship long enough to start wondering when/if he’s going to say the “L” word?  Have you had late night phone calls to your girlfriends where you ask them endlessly “does he really love me?”

Maybe you have tried dropping little hints or suggestions to get him to say it, but the truth is that he won’t unless he is really ready.  On the other hand, when he IS ready, he will start to drop some very important clues to test the L waters with you.  Here are some of those clues uncovered!  You don’t need all of them to know if he loves you or not, every man is different, but if he hits a few on this list consider yourself one lucky girl.

1. He communicates with you frequently.

When a man loves a woman, he can’t get enough of her.  When he’s not seeing her, he will be texting, calling, emailing, doing anything he can do to keep in touch.  He will want to know how your day was.  He will over share.  He will begin to mention future activities he would like to do with you, and make plans for events stretching into the future.

2. He tells you intimate things. 

Although many men have a difficult time opening up about serious experiences, issues and memories, the man who really loves you will feel comfortable enough to reach this vulnerable position with you.

If this happens on the first date, this is not love, just copious oversharing.  If this begins to happen three to six months into the relationship, then he is definitely falling in love with you.  Examples of intimate things he may share with you will be details of a divorce or other painful breakup in his life, stories about his family and childhood, his life goals and dreams.  If he talks about his mother specifically, and more than once or twice, he doesn’t have mommy issues, he could be subconsciously letting you know that he wants to marry someone like her, and you might be it.

3. He takes risks with you.

The men that love their women are the ones on the dance floor with them who would never agree to dance in the past (in public?? THE HORROR).  Smitten men will also express sudden excitement over other things like sky diving, cake decorating classes, and trips to the library. What these activities have in common is that he has never considered them before, but is now 100% bought into doing them.  Taking risks is identified by anything he does that is out of his comfort zone.  If he’s said yes to going to the ballet on Christmas Eve, he is starting to feel some strong feelings for you.

Enjoy this while it lasts, since after he gets comfortable in the relationship, he’ll often stop agreeing to do whatever you want at the drop of a hat.

4. He treats you like you walk on water.

The contemporary colloquialism to this is being treated like a queen or princess.  If it seems like you can do nothing wrong, and he is going out of his way with gestures to protect you, keep you safe and free from the mud puddles of the world, he is in love and is using gallant actions to display these feelings for you.

Conversely, you must LET HIM treat you this way.  Enjoy it.  Say thank you.  Encourage the behavior.  Don’t grunt at him and say “I can open that door MYSELF.”  Often these chivalrous, protective instincts show up before he even knows he has strong feelings for you.  If you throw water on the spark at this point, it can be a disaster.

5. He starts using the “L” word frequently in random conversation.

When a man is ready to share his love, he will start using the word. In most cases he will not say the word TO you directly, the way you may be hoping he will. But he will start to love everything else.  He will start signing emails Love, or start slipping it into conversation.  “I would love to see you again.” Or “I love chili fries too!” or, if he is feeling more daring, “I love doing stuff with you!”  If you start hearing this word randomly crop up, the “L” word in exactly the way you want to hear it is on its way to you.

6. He actually says the three little words.

This may sound obvious but many women don’t believe it when they finally hear the words, but this is the truth. Men don’t often casually throw out I love you’s.  Beware if he says this way too soon, it is a red flag for someone unbalanced.  However, if you’re hearing it at the 3-6 month mark, take it at face value.  Especially if he’s nervous and acting strange when he spits it out.

The Bottom Line – Does He Really Love You?

When it comes to figuring out whether or not a man really loves you, the keep the phrase “actions speak louder than words” in mind.  He may wax poetically about how great you are, but if he disappears for long periods of time and doesn’t communicate clearly, this is something to keep an eye one.

In a nutshell, you will know how he loves you by the way he speaks and behaves in your presence, as well as when you’re not around.   In most cases, we know in our heart of hearts how he feels, but women have this tendency to second-guess other people’s feelings and intentions.

These are just some clues to how he feels.  Letting him get there on his own pace and timing will strengthen that love to the point where you’ll never question it again.

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Elizabeth Stone

About Elizabeth Stone

Elizabeth Stone is the founder of Attract The One.

Her popular program Ex Attraction Formula, has helped hundreds of women reunite with their men. She is thrilled to have helped so many people reignite the spark in their relationships.

Tirelessly focused on helping people improve their love lives, her work has been featured on EHarmony Blog, YourTango, Thought Catalog, Mogul, Fox News Magazine, Ravishly, Femalista, Popsugar, Read Unwritten, Medium and many more.

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