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5 Things You Should Never, EVER Say To Your Ex
This is Brad Browning, relationship coach and author of “The Ex Factor” guide, and I’m just going to talk quickly about some of the things you should never say to your ex if you want to get back together with them.
These are common things that people often say to their ex in the wake of a breakup that they probably should not have said and will regret down the road if they want to get back together with their ex.
1. Begging or Pleading.
The first thing you definitely do not want to say to your ex after a breakup is any sort of begging or pleading, such as, “Please give me another try,” or “I promise I’ll change if you’ll just give me another chance.”
This is going to do absolutely nothing to change your exe’s mind.
They have made up their mind on their own. Your groveling and begging is just going to make you seem desperate and pretty pathetic. Even though at the time it may have been a very logical-seeming thing to do, it’s definitely not something you want to say. No begging or pleading after a breakup if you want to get back together.
2. Don’t tell your ex how much you love and miss them.
Second thing you don’t want to say are things like, “I miss you,” and “I still love you.”
Again, those may be things that are completely true. You may still love them, and you may miss them like crazy, but you don’t want to tell your ex that right now. You need them to be guessing. You need to have some mystery.
You definitely don’t want to seem desperate or heart broken in the eyes of your ex. That’s not going to help you get them back, so don’t say, “I miss you,” and don’t say, “I still love you,” until the time is right. And, believe me, the time is not right for a long time after the breakup until you’ve made some real progress towards getting back together.
3. Don’t tell them how upset you are.
Third thing you don’t want to say, and this ties into the whole desperation thing—you don’t want to say things like, “I’m so heart broken,” and “I’m so depressed,” and “I can’t live without you.”
Don’s say things that give off a very clear message of being distraught, being heart broken, being depressed. You want you ex to think that, sure, you are affected by the breakup. I mean, you cared about them. You wanted to be in this relationship, but you’re going to be fine.
Also, you want your ex to think that you are going to move on and that you don’t need them in order to have a happy, successful life. So, saying things like, “I’m so heart broken,” “I’m so depressed,” and all those sorts of things, are going to make you seem desperate. This is not going to help you get them back.
4. Don’t say anything angry or hateful.
Another thing you don’t want to say to your ex after the breakup is things like, “I hate you,” or “You treated me so badly,” “You weren’t right for me anyway.”
You definitely don’t want to say any of those sort of angry, hateful things to your ex. It’s only going to cause conflict that will reinforce their decision to break up with you because you are saying all these mean things in the wake of your breakup.
Even if there was a lot of conflict and drama that surrounded your breakup, you still don’t want to show anger. You don’t want your ex to think that you’re angry at them. You could be upset. That’s natural. But, you don’t want your ex to think that you’re angry. So, don’t say anything that will give that impression.
5. Don’t tell them never to speak to you again.
Finally, the last thing you don’t want to say is things like, “Never talk to me again.”
That’s the kind of thing you’ll say in the heat of the moment, but you’ll end up regretting later, because often times your ex will take that seriously, especially if your breakup was clean and your relationship was very serious.
They’ll value your feelings. They won’t want to hurt you. So, if you say something like, “Never talk to me again,” they will probably at least, for a certain period of time, take you up on that. So, if you do want your ex back, you don’t want to tell them things such as, “Never talk to me again,” because it’s certainly not going to help the chances of getting back together.
Now, if you’ve already made some of these mistakes, and I’m sure some of you out there watching are thinking, “Ah, crap, I’ve already said some of these things.”
Don’t worry, don’t panic, just head over to my website, and watch the free video on there. You’ll learn a few new things, and you can also sign up for my program or get my email address, shoot me an email, and tell me about your situation. And, hopefully, I can help you out.
If you found this information useful, make sure you click here to watch my free presentation to learn more right now.